By The Campfire

August 1, 2008

I kind of saw this one coming. My investments are worth less. My house is worth less. My car is worth less. Now I am worth less. My life, that is. The value of human life in America is dropping faster than the stock market. Are you surprised? Don’t be.

Our lives are worth $1 million less today than five years ago according to the Environmental Protection Agency’s latest “value of statistical life.” That’s $6.9 million in today’s dollars, down from $7.9 million. Not good news, but the real question is: Can I use that $6.9 million value as collateral on a “life equity loan?” Probably not, mainly because my loan would be worth more than my devalued life.

Here’s why the government puts a price on our heads: If they make up a law or rule or a regulation that puts a monetary value on human life – let’s say they are weighing the cost versus life-saving benefits, for instance – they need to know what that life value actually is. Now we know – $1 million less than just five years ago.

This may explain why I see so many people talking about losing weight on TV. They are. They're a lot lighter in the wallet.

I can hear Ronald Reagan asking America (in a debate with Jimmy Carter) if they are better off now than four years ago. Ask us that question now and get ready to count to one million and add a dollar sign on the left.

Basically, this means that – depending on the situation – it is now more cost-effective to let us die. I have suspected this for longer than five years, but it is a punch in the gut to see it admitted in an AP story.

So let me get this straight, you and I are worth a lot less, but gas is worth a lot more. Now I get it. Soon, people won’t be worth the trouble we cause, economically speaking, of course, well, unless those people are wealthy. Like automobiles, some of us are BMW’s and some are used Mavericks, Vegas and Pacers. Using that basic reasoning, it would seem that as people become more affluent, their value goes up, statically. And conversely the opposite as they become poorer.

See where this is going?

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